As anyone who's seen my office knows, upkeep is not my forte. My motto when it comes to cleaning: "Why do today what you can do tomorrow? In fact, are you really sure you want to do it then? Wouldn't you rather finish watching UHF on Netflix?"
I know. It's a long motto.
I'm almost as slovenly when it comes to digital housekeeping. An example: This blog is updated every Monday morning at 8 a.m. PST, although sometimes it's Monday night, plus approximately every other Monday is skipped, and some Mondays become Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays or Sundays, depending on how interested I am in whatever it is I'm watching on Netflix at the time.
But today I'm being a good doobie (although it isn't even Monday morning) because there's news to share.
News Flash #1: As announced last week, my 99 cent short story collection My Dog Needs Surgery is going to a new home in the country on March 1. It'll be much happier out there, believe me. It'll have fresh air and all that room to run around and animals to play with and...what's that? Can you go visit it sometime? Uhhhh, no. Farmer Brown...um...has leprosy. Sorry. So say goodbye to your little pal. You'll never see him again. Of course, if you want to buy a copy of your very own, you can still do so here, here or here. For now. UPDATE #1: It's done. My Dog is gone. So now everyone who bought a copy has a collector's item. Assuming a mobi file can be "collected."
News Flash #2: My other e-collections, Naughty: Nine Tales of Christmas Crime and Dear Mr. Holmes: Seven Holmes on the Range Mysteries, aren't going anywhere, but they will be getting more expensive. As of March 1, the Amazon price will rise from $2.99 to $3.99, while the print version of Dear Mr. Holmes will go from $9.99 to $11.99. (The prices have already gone up on Smashwords and the Barnes & Noble website.) So if you've got a Kindle and you want some good, cheap reading before it gets slightly less cheap, act now. UPDATE #2: Well, the joke's on me, because as soon as I raised the prices to $3.99 and $11.99, Amazon discounted the titles back to $2.99 and $8.99. Which means that the Dear Mr. Holmes paperback is now cheaper than it was before. Stock up now for Christmas, folks....
News Flash #3: The audiobook for my novel Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: Dreadfully Ever After has been nominated for an Audie Award in the Fantasy category!Thank you, Audio Publishers Association! And thank you, narrator/voice actor/genius Katherine Kellgren! Unfortunately, Katherine's up against Cousin Balki, so I'm not sure if we'll take home the award. Cross your fingers for us, folks. UPDATE #3: We haven't been un-nominated! Yippee! I know that's not much of an "update," but I just couldn't stop at two.
News Flash #4: If you're not already sick of me by this point, maybe you've got the stomach to read a whole interview with me. A lovely one was recently posted here. You do want to learn the secret connection between Holmes on the Range and obsessive lighthouse fetishists, don't you? REAL UPDATE #3: After writing my fake update, I stumbled upon some actual news. (Well, if a newly posted interview with me can be considered "news".) You can click here to go to the Book Equals website, where I answer questions about the future of the Pride and Prejudice and Zombies saga.
News Flash #5: New York singer-songwriter-Paul Robeson impersonator-tuba player Sam Kulik has set one of my old poems to music. You can experience his rendition of "So You Want to Be a Slug" here. I get a big kick out of it, but you should probably keep in mind that one of my favorite movies is Eraserhead.
News Flash #6: I'm all out of News Flashes.