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Oh, my God! I'm scrambling to get packed for Houston, and you people think I should be blogging? Are you out of your ever-lovin' minds?!?
Well, maybe you are -- or maybe I am -- since the "you people" telling me to blog are all voices in my head. Still...those mothers are loud! "Your new book just came out...PROMOTE, you schmuck!" they keep shrieking.
But seeing as I don't have any time and I'm not exactly a master of self promotion anyway, I'm going to go the easy route: plagiarism. It's too late to steal someone else's book, so instead I'm just going to steal someone else's book contest.
Joseph Finder's, to be exact. Joe's telling folks he'll give 'em a free paperback if they buy his new hardcover. Smart! Move units while cleaning out the garage! I'm so down with that.
Only I'm no Joe. For one thing, I'm not a super-successful publishing JUGGERNAUT!!! I also don't have a wonderful assistant named Claire, as Joe apparently does. I don't even have a smelly, completely incompetent assistant named Cletus or Bobo. (Bobo would be my trained monkey. If I had a trained monkey. Which, as stated above, I do not. So hold off on those protests, PETA!) I mean, obviously I need help (in more ways than one), but it's just me here, so I have to make this a first come, first served kinda deal.
Here it is. The first 10 people to send me their receipt for The Crack in the Lens will get, absotively posilutely free, the paperback edition of either On the Wrong Track or The Black Dove. (They can also have the Japanese-language edition of On the Wrong Track, if they want, but I can't imagine I'm going to get many takers on that. Even in Japan.)
If you want to hop aboard the free book gravy train, shoot me a message at steve AT stevehockensmith DOT com and...well, I'm still working on the details. (No Claire, remember?) And tell 'em Joe sent you!
Now...where did I put that damn suitcase...?
Steve Hockensmith
July 27, 2009
It's finally here. D-Day. Time to sweep those Ratzis out of France and dump 'em back across the Rhine where they belong. They're dug in deep, sure, but that's never stopped you hard-luck dog faces before, has it? So come on, Easy Company -- MOVE OUT!!! Whoops. Sorry to go all Sgt. Rock on you. Wrong D-Day. No one needs you to storm Normandy. What you need to storm is your local independent bookstore. Because, lucky for us, "D-Day" for a book means "drop day" -- as in the day it finally goes on the shelves. And Tuesday, July 21 -- a.k.a. tomorrow -- is drop day for The Crack in the Lens. (Which, news flash, the Dallas Morning News likes quite a bit, thank you very much.) If you live in the Bay Area, you can celebrate with me live and in person (well, I'll be there in person, anyway -- no promises on how lively) at Alameda's Books Inc. at 7 p.m. If you can't make the 5/50/500/5,000-mile trek to be there, no worries. Over the next few weeks, I'll be popping up here and there to promote the book. And if you still can't catch me in person this summer, just stock up on copies and I'll sign them for you at the Bouchercon mystery convention in Indianapolis come October. I mean -- you'll be there, right? If I miss my panel, look for me in the bar. And if you can't be there, well, then you're just plain screwed...or maybe not! Because as a reward for reading this far, you now have the chance to win a copy of The Crack in the Lens absolutely free! (I know -- that "absolutely free" bit is, like, totally redundant. If you win a prize, it's "free" by definition, right? But doesn't it sound better to win something absolutely free?) Here's the deal. The first person to answer the question below correctly gets The Crack in the Lens and a super-special bonus prize...absolutely free, of course! (The bonus prize is so super-special I haven't even decided what it is yet.) The fifth person to answer the question correctly gets The Crack in the Lens (absolutely free!) and...oh, I don't know...a bookmark. (Not all bonus prizes can be super-special.) And the second, third, fourth, sixth, seventh, eighth, ninth and tenth people to answer the question correctly will get a personalized e-mail from me telling them that they did not win the contest. Print it out, and it's a suitable-for-framing collectible! The question: Who is America's best-selling author of Sherlockian historical mysteries set in the Old West? Where to send your answer: steve AT stevehockensmith DOT com Now come on, Easy Company -- MOVE OUT!!! Steve Hockensmith
July 20, 2009 UPDATE: The eagle has landed, the book has dropped. Huzzah! But then again, I don't need to tell you, because you already ran out this morning and bought your copies (makes a great gift!) and have dived right into reading it. Right? Right?
For weeks now, I've been thinking I oughta weigh in on the whole Robert Downey Jr.-as-Holmes thing. I could just never work up enough enthusiasm for it, though. (For weighing in, that is.) So what a break for me that I no longer need to bother thanks to Rafe McGregor over at The Rap Sheet. He makes every point I would have plus a good bunch more, and he makes them very well indeed. Nicely done, sir! Now would you mind blogging about my newest book? I can never work up much enthusiasm for Blatant Self Promotion, either.... Steve Hockensmith
July 13, 2009
Just in case any of you were worried that my brother Ron and I were going to be supplying the artwork for my upcoming (professional) comic book debut, here's a sneak peek at the work being done by pencil/ink master Scott Brooks. As you can see, the story involves pirates and a scary guy in very tight clothes. As you can also see, Scott's doing a superfantabulous job bringing it to life. Oh, and the comic book in question -- The Phantom: Generations #6 -- goes on sale August 26. Ask for it by name! Cuz, y'know, if you go into the store and ask for "the comic about pirates and the scary guy in very tight clothes," the dude behind the register is probably gonna look at you funny.... Steve Hockensmith
July 11, 2009 
Well, it's finally official: I am a Twit. Or, to be more exact (I hope), I am a Twitterer. Meaning I'm someone who sends goofy little messages via that Twitter thingie all the kids have been talking about. (Or, to be a lot more exact, I'm an author who finally let his publisher talk him into trying that Twitter thingie all the kids have been talking about even though said author is kinda skeptical about the whole danged thing.) If you want to see what all the fuss is about, head on over to twitter.com, join up, then go here to become one of my "followers." Yeah, I know. "Followers." Makes it sound like I've got my own cult or something. Saaaaaaaaaaaay, that's not a bad idea. After all, it worked out O.K. for Sun Myung Moon and L. Ron Hubbard, right? So what do you think my disciples ought to be called: "Hockies" or "Hockentologists"? Steve Hockensmith
July 7, 2009
Given what I've posted here about my upcoming issue of the Phantom:Generations mini-series, you might think I'd never written an illustrated superhero story before. And you'd be mostly right. I have written such a tale, it turns out. But I was never paid for it...because the publisher was me, and the resulting story was never read by anyone other than me and my older brother, Ron. Until today. Twenty-eight summers ago, Ron and I created S&H Presents #1, a Brave and the Bold/DC Comics Presents homage/rip-off. I wrote the story. Ron did the artwork and most of the typing. He also provided (according to the masthead) "creative assistance," which mostly means he slipped in lots of silly bits that really pissed me off. Today, of course, I think it's hilarious that one of my macho men-in-tights speaks to the other "yearningly," and that his police scanner comes from Radio Shack, but at the time I just thought my brother was making fun of me. And he was. Unfortunately, I wasn't old enough to laugh along and, alas, S&H Presents #2 was both a solo effort and purt-near unreadable. El Numero Uno's not exactly Watchmen, either, but it has its moments. (You've gotta love any Superman story in which the villain refers to the Man of Steel as "a pyle of Crap.") I present the tale to you now with this solemn, pre-Phantom: Generations promise: I've gotten better at this kind of thing, I swear. Steve Hockensmith
July 2, 2009 CAVEAT #1: For reasons that are long lost in the mists of time, S&H Presents #1 was printed on what appears to be scrap paper from the office of a Southern Indiana architectural firm. So sections about "The Ultimate in Living Family Condominiums" are not part of the Superman/Wildcat team-up story and should be ignored. CAVEAT #2: I was 12 years old when I wrote this. Please remember that. CLICK TO ENLARGE (IF NOT ENTERTAIN)  
 
  
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